THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS CASUAL SEX
Society seems to think that sex can be casual….. but I’m learning to disagree. Sex is ,absolutely, the most intimate thing you can do with your body — -in relation to another person. Sex connects you with your deepest- darkest-(and lightest!!!!) — but most primal emotions
How the fuck is that in any way casual?
I think we are a society that is deluding itself. I think we are deluded about what sex is actually for. when we have sex we connect to our deepest emotions….YOU CAN”T AVOID IT….
thats why…. when you fuck people who are not committed to knowing you…. talking to you…caring for you…. after the sex is over…we feel empty and abandoned. And we have to strategize how to be ok with that. Even with friends that we slide in/squirt on… If you aren’t there for the feelings that come up after the fuck — -you were never there at all…You were just masterbating on each other…to fill a hole in our gloriously fractured (but INNOCENT) egos.
WE DON’T HAVE SEX TO GET OFF WE HAVE SEX TO KNOW OUR DEEPEST SELVES IN RELATION TO EACH OTHER. thats why the high wears off so fast and the confusion remains…
We are feed so much hype around sexuality and the power/ego boosts you can get from lots and lots of desire from lots and lots of different people. A whole world of searching and longing…. but looking in all the wrong ding dongs…and who wongs(haha) (Seriously…the ratio of people in actual happy horny relationships is disturbingly low.)
I personally think we have sex for the deep ass conversations that come up after it’s over. Because we are spiritual seekers longing to KNOW OURSELVES…thats what we are ACTUALLY HERE FOR…and sex COULD BE the fastest track to that. IF we didn’t treat it like a convenience store.
After the night of passion, we want to know what the hell just happened. To have the people we shared the experience with be totally open and ready to hear each other. HONESTLY…especially the icky parts. CAUSE THATS WHERE WE EXPAND!!!!!
We want to be truly seen by our community and our partners. We want to feel safe to be openly curious about who we are and have people to do that with.
Which is why, I think, we need to get so drunk or high in order to bang people that we don’t have intention to hold honest space for.
This rant is not about having LESS SEX….and it is defiantly NOT SLUT SHAMING because my global goal is to live in a community of people who really wanna know each other and would never dream of abandoning each other….and therefore… can happily, harmoniously, fuck the bliss out of each other This rant is about setting our sights higher….setting the bar higher….And making sure we are adored body mind and soul before during and after a truly magical fuck.